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Is Positivity Toxic?

In today's video I discuss this very thing.

Watch it here.

The word toxic positivity is an oxymoron. Or as we like to call it at Stop the Mind Screw a "toxi-moron!"

As a Positive Mindset Coach, it appears that I may teach rainbows and butterflies, but I beg to differ.

I have news for those who think that. I get mad! I get really angry!

BUT I do not get reactive nor is that what I teach.

I go within, feel the emotion, talk to my Inner Being and find a way to be proactive instead of reactive.

Proactivity can look like drawing a boundary with someone who has treated you ugly.

Or by being kind to yourself and taking a break from the situation.

So, positivity is not toxic. It can be forced, but that is stupidity and not positive at all!!

It is my hope that I change the mind of kids nowadays who call positivity toxic. Heck, I think there is a therapist who has a book titled Toxic Positivity.

Is she correct? Yes and no! The positivity she is talking about is FORCED. That is not...

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The Person You Talk to The Most

We talk to ourselves more than anyone else. But do you know the quality of those thoughts? Do you monitor this?

This is where our power lies.

In today's video, I discuss this very thing.

 

Chapters: 00:00 Intro 01:04 First thought 01:44 Reactivity/Proactivity 03:20 Insomnia Pitfalls: 05:27 1.Shape our beleifs 06:31 2. Outlook is affected 08:13 3. Personalize it Solutions: 10:13 1. Decisions are easier 10:35 2. Re-write those limiting beliefs 12:23 3. Who you surround yourself with even in self-talk 14:46 4. Exercise 15:50 5. Triggers 17:34 6. Have a sense of humor Humor 13:34

Tim Ferris Podcast with Matthew https://tinyurl.com/4yevjjtt

Green Lights https://amzn.to/2NAReLK

Toxic positivity https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLM...

Joseph Rodrigues https://www.youtube.com/user/JoeRodri...

Trigger video https://youtu.be/xeRobcFt-jA

House was stolen from me: https://youtu.be/5JhiPunRegQ

Stop the mind screw! https://www.kathieowen.com/screw Get your simple thought habit...

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Get in the Zone Like This!

Today's video is all about getting in the zone or flow as Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi calls it in his book titled Flow.

Main takeaways:

A person in flow has a high interest in life, they are persistent and they have low self-centeredness.

I discuss my personal experience with Flow, stay tuned to the very end where I explain something that happened on this very video! ‍

There are 4 undesired outcomes or pitfalls from not being in flow:

  1. Distractions both internal and external
  2. Resistance
  3. Wanting of instant gratification
  4. Monkey mind

Solutions

  1. Suggestions on how to block distractions
  2. A mental diet which becomes a lifestyle (Here's my video on mental diets)
  3. Tame the monkey mind with journaling and meditation
  4. Non-resistance

I also discuss toxic positivity and when this type of approach is not possible due to the stages of grief.

Hope to see you there! 

 

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Why I Hate the Term Toxic Positivity

I hate the term #toxicpositivity. And I don’t use the word 'hate' unless it is absolutely necessary.

Why? Because positivity saved my life. There is nothing toxic about it. That my friends is an illusion!!!

As a survivor of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder I could have easily blamed positivity for all my problems. And told people, “You don’t know what I went through!!” or “Please, it was really bad.”

No, I learned from many years of therapy, awareness, and contemplation that does absolutely no good. 

All that does is keep you in victim mode. And after being in victim mode for so long you come out and victimize everyone and everything - including positivity. #dumb

Instead, enter victor mode. Become aware that these victim/victimizer thoughts are all illusions. 

Serve the principles of truth, integrity, courage and above all LOVE!! 

Those principles my friend ARE POSITIVITY.

Those principles saved my life!! And could save yours....

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Toxic Positivity WTF?!

I first heard this term about a year ago. It just feels wrong to me. But I truly wanted to understand this concept so I did some research. I now understand why and when someone would view thinking positively as toxic. But positivity itself is NOT toxic. What is toxic? FORCED positivity.

Who came up with this term anyhow? First of all, positivity is not even a real word. And second of all, if it were the two terms do not go together. It is a true oxymoron.

So what is toxic positivity? Well, I find it to be when something really tragic happens and someone tells you, "Everything happens for a reason." or "Just think positive it will be over soon." That my friends are forcing positive vibes on someone who needs to grieve. That is FORCED positivity. 

Study the diagram of consciousness by David Hawkins. It is Power VS Force. Do you think someone who is coming from POWER is going to FORCE positivity on someone? NO! So, therefore, what I teach is not toxic, nor is positivity...

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