The Day Love Taught Me Courage
Expect Nothing. Handle Anything.
How one unforgettable day taught me the true meaning of love, courage, and letting go.
This article is close to my heart. This is my core speech—the one that keeps evolving as I grow, as life teaches me new lessons, and as my audience shifts.
It’s called “Expect Nothing. Handle Anything.”
Those four words changed the way I see the world. They helped me through one of the hardest days of my life. They helped me understand love, courage, and what true inner excellence really means.
Let’s dive in. (read the article below)
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The Weight of Expectations
Expectations are funny things, aren’t they?
They sneak into our minds disguised as hope or motivation. We expect the job offer to come through. We expect people to behave the way we think they should. We expect our plans to unfold perfectly.
And when they don’t?
We feel frustrated, disappointed, or even betrayed.
But here’s the truth: expectations are the root of suffering.
When we attach to how we think life “should” be, we rob ourselves of the beauty of how it actually is.
And yes—“should” is a dirty word. It’s a sneaky trap that limits what’s possible.
A Football Game That Changed Everything
It all started with a football game.
January 12, 2025.
The Philadelphia Eagles were playing the Green Bay Packers in the playoffs.
Now, I’m a sports psychology geek, so naturally, I was watching for mindset moments—those mental battles you can see written all over the players’ faces.
During the game, something odd happened. The announcers started teasing A.J. Brown, a star receiver for the Eagles. Why? Because he was reading a book on the sidelines.
Reading.
In the middle of an NFL playoff game!
People online were having a field day with it. Memes, jokes, commentary—“Who does he think he is?”
But my curiosity kicked in.
What was this mysterious book?
So I Googled it.
It was called “Inner Excellence: Train Your Mind for Extraordinary Performance and the Best Possible Life.”
And I thought, Well, that sounds like my kind of book.
I ordered it the next morning.
And wow… it changed me.
It’s all about how elite athletes perform at their peak—not by trying harder, but by letting go.
By releasing expectations, pressure, and fear.
By trusting the moment.
That’s where I found the phrase that would become the heart of my message:
Expect nothing. Handle anything.
Three Pillars Releasing Expectations
To truly live this mindset, I’ve discovered three key pillars.
1. Non-Attachment
When we cling to how things should be, we miss the beauty of how they are.
Non-attachment doesn’t mean apathy. It means you care deeply, but you’re not controlled by the outcome.
Think of it like holding a butterfly in your hand.
If you squeeze too tightly, you’ll crush it.
If you hold it gently, it can stay—and maybe even fly back after it leaves.
That’s how our dreams, relationships, and goals work too.
2. Radical Responsibility
This one gets a bad rap. Responsibility sounds heavy.
But radical responsibility is actually freedom.
It’s saying, “No matter what happens, I own my response.”
No blame. No excuses.
It means you don’t give away your power to circumstances or people.
It’s not about control—it’s about ownership.
And that’s a game-changer.
3. Courage
Fear never goes away.
We wait for the fear to fade before we act—but the truth is, courage means moving with fear, not without it.
Courage is action in the presence of fear.
And courage is what allows us to live the first two pillars—because letting go and taking responsibility both take guts.
When Life Tests the Lesson
Now, it’s easy to talk about these things when life is calm.
It’s another story when life breaks your heart.
A few months ago, my beloved dog Rusty—my companion for over 14 years—began to decline.
He’d already lost his sight, but honestly, he never lost his spirit. He’d bump into things, sure, but he still wagged his tail. He still found his way to me.
I used to look at him and think, He doesn’t even know he’s blind.
But then, about three weeks ago, he started to fade more quickly. He slept longer. He stopped eating.
When Rusty turned down Chick-fil-A nuggets, I knew something was wrong.
I made a vet appointment, hoping for a simple fix—a steroid shot, maybe something to boost his appetite. I was clinging to hope.
And then, as I loaded him into the car, I noticed something on the floorboard:
My little notebook.
And on the top page, in my own handwriting, were the words:
Radical Responsibility.
It stopped me cold.
This wasn’t about a vet visit. It was about love. About letting go. About taking responsibility for the life—and death—of a soul I cherished.
I had to embody everything I’d been teaching.
I had to release my attachment to how things should be.
I had to take responsibility for the choice no one wants to make.
And I had to find courage—because fear was definitely there.
The Fourth Element: Love
And then something beautiful happened.
When I stopped resisting and chose from love, not fear, everything changed.
Love helped me release my grip on control.
Love helped me take full responsibility without guilt or blame.
Love gave me courage.
Because love and fear can’t coexist.
When I finally made that decision—to let him go peacefully—I expected heartbreak.
But instead, my heart filled with something else: peace.
Gratitude.
Joy.
Even bliss.
Because love transcends endings.
And in that sacred space, I understood the full meaning of my message:
When you expect nothing, you can handle anything.
The Freedom of Letting Go
Expectations aren’t just about outcomes—they’re about identity.
We expect ourselves to always be strong, successful, productive, or in control.
But what if life is actually trying to show us that we’re already enough, right where we are?
What if freedom comes from release, not from results?
When we stop fighting “what is,” peace has room to enter.
Rusty’s journey reminded me that love doesn’t end—it evolves.
That courage isn’t loud—it’s quiet and grounded.
That responsibility isn’t a burden—it’s empowerment.
Living the Lesson
So how can you live this way in your own life?
Here are three simple ways to start:
Catch your expectations.
Every time you say “should,” pause. Ask, “Who decided that?”
Release the story. Choose curiosity instead of control.
Own your part.
Take radical responsibility for your mindset, your reactions, and your energy.
It’s not about blame—it’s about reclaiming your power.
Lead with love.
When fear shows up, breathe. Ask, “What would love do right now?”
Then act from that space.
Final Thoughts
AJ Brown reading Inner Excellence wasn’t just a viral moment. It was a visual reminder that the strongest people are the ones who train their minds as fiercely as their bodies.
And sometimes, that training shows up in everyday life—in football games, in tough decisions, or in saying goodbye to a best friend.
Expectations will always try to creep back in. But when they do, remember:
Let go of how you think things should be.
Take responsibility for what is.
Have the courage to keep moving.
And let love lead the way.
Because when you expect nothing…
You really can handle anything.
💛 About Kathie Owen
Kathie Owen is a Corporate Wellness Consultant, Mindset Coach, and Chief Encouragement Officer dedicated to helping leaders, teams, and individuals live with energy, purpose, and heart. Through her Coaching and Consulting she helps people find peace under pressure and joy in the journey.
Read More Articles from Kathie
Transcript
You are listening to Kathie's Coaching podcast. I'm your host, Kathie Owen, and today I'm sharing with you my core speech. This speech changes all the time depending on what audience I'm talking to, but this is a practice run for Toastmasters on Friday. And in fact, I did this for, as a guest speaker for an evaluation contest, and I got five evaluations of my speech, and this is a reiteration of that using the feedback I got on those evaluations. So without further ado, let's get into the episode.
Kathie (2):0:39
Expectations are a funny thing. And today I wanna shift your perspective of expectations and think for a moment, think of something you're expecting in the future that's gonna be really, really good. And also think of something you're expecting in your future that might not be so good. January 12th, 2025. I was watching the professional football game playoff between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Green Bay Packers. During this game, I hear the announcers making fun of a, of AJ Brown of the Philadelphia Eagles. He was reading this book on the sidelines. Who did he think he was reading a book on the sidelines? The book, I looked it up the next day on Google. It was going viral and so was AJ Brown. The book, inner Excellence Train Your Mind for Extraordinary Performance and the Best Possible Life. I read it cover to cover. It's everything I coach is sports Psychology is how athletes can perform at their top level, despite all the stress, despite all the expectations. Hmm. In fact, expect nothing, handle anything is where I came up with the title of this speech. It came from this book. And I believe there are three components to truly expect nothing and handle anything. Number one, non-attachment. When we attach to our expectations of how we think things should be, we limit ourselves. And by the way, should is a dirty word. So let go of your attachments to how things should be. Number two, radical responsibility. Responsibility gets a bad rap, but when you take radical responsibility, you take complete ownership for everything that happens. You don't blame anybody and you also have, don't have any excuses. Hmm. I like need some radical responsibility. And number three, it's definitely gonna take courage. Because courage means you take action despite fear, because fear is going to be there. So go back to your expectations and think about that, because just recently I had to live all three of these in an expected moment that I thought I couldn't handle. My beloved dog of 14 and a half years, his health had been dwindling. I mean, we expect that to happen in 14, 15, 16. I heard some blast as much as 17, 18 years. Well, Rusty's was coming to an end six months ago. He lost his sight, but the little guy never lost his spirit. I swear he didn't even know he was blind, but. Three weeks ago, he started dwindling down, sleeping whole lot, and in the last week or so, he stopped eating. He wouldn't even eat Chick-fil-A chicken nuggets. Oh, I knew something was wrong. I made an appointment with the vet. I had already talked about this day coming, and we'd already discussed what could happen and. I made an appointment with the vet hoping they could give him a steroid shot, maybe they could increase his appetite. So as I put him in the car that very day, I looked out at the floorboard and there was my little notebook that I write notes in all the time. And the words in my own handwriting was radical responsibility. Hmm. I had to take radical responsibility for his life, for the life that I was so blessed with. All of these years. I had to take responsibility for the attachment that I had to how things should be. And yeah, when we got to the vet, it took courage to face that decision because. I didn't want him to suffer anymore. Expected that day to be really, really hard. But when I had these three elements changed everything, the fourth element really changed everything and that my friends is love. Love helped me not be attached to how it should be. And love helped me take complete responsibility for what was taking place in my life. And love was what gave me the courage to make that decision And love can take place'cause love and fear cannot coexist. And when I made that decision, my heart was filled with gratitude, with joy, with bliss. Yeah, I grieved, but not in the way you think because when you expect nothing, you can handle anything. Thank you.
6:21
All right, that's my episode for today. I trust that you found it helpful. If you know someone who could benefit from this, please share it with them. And until next time, I will see you next time. Peace out and namaste.
Expectations shape how we see life—but what if we let them go? In this heartfelt post, I share how my dog Rusty, a courageous soul who lost his sight but never his spirit, taught me the three pillars of freedom: non-attachment, radical responsibility, and courage. When you expect nothing, you can handle anything. 💛
#Mindset #Courage #LettingGo #InnerExcellence #KathieOwen