Why Your Signs Show Up When You Stop Trying So Hard
When Life Whispers: Lessons from “Signs”
Life has a funny way of sending us messages—tiny nudges, coincidences, or even people who show up out of nowhere at the exact right time. Sometimes they’re quiet. Sometimes they’re loud. And sometimes, like in Ted Lasso’s episode “Signs,” they’re so obvious we can’t ignore them.
But here’s the catch: signs don’t show up when we’re gripping life with both hands. They show up when we let go.
This is the lesson I learned—not just from Ted, Rebecca, and Keeley—but from my own life. And today, I want to explore how letting go of control, facing fear with courage, and trusting life’s timing can open doors you didn’t even know existed.
Watch the video here:
Listen to the podcast episode here:
The Magic of the “Signs” Episode
If you’ve seen the Ted Lasso episode called “Signs,” you know it’s packed with meaning. Every character is searching for something—a direction, a confirmation, a sense that they’re on the right path.
Rebecca visits a psychic who says strange things she doesn’t believe—until they start coming true.
Keeley faces endings in her business that she didn’t plan, only to stumble into new beginnings.
Ted struggles with doubt, faith, and anxiety, yet slowly realizes that the quiet shifts in his world are his own form of divine reassurance.
Their stories remind us that signs look different for everyone. Sometimes it’s a voice in your head that says, “Go for it.” Sometimes it’s a door slamming shut. Sometimes it’s the stranger who says the exact words you needed to hear.
And all of it begins when you stop forcing life to go your way.
Why We Crave Signs
Let’s be honest—humans love control. We love plans, certainty, and guarantees. We love feeling safe.
But growth rarely comes with a map.
We crave signs because deep down we want to know:
Am I on the right path?
Will this work out?
Is there something bigger guiding me?
The paradox is that signs appear most clearly when we stop demanding them. They come alive when we relax our grip on how things “should” unfold.
For me, this realization came during a time when I was trying to micromanage every detail of my business—every client, every sale, every post. The moment I released control, unexpected opportunities began to flow. Speaking gigs appeared. Collaborations surfaced. Doors opened on their own.
It was as if the universe was saying, “Finally. You’ve stopped blocking the flow.”
Open-Handed Living
I call it open-handed living.
It means trusting that life knows what it’s doing—even when you don’t.
Think about it:
When your hands are clenched, nothing new can enter.
When you open them, anything can.
At one point, I thought my corporate job was the pinnacle of my career. It looked perfect on paper—steady paycheck, leadership role, health fairs, and wellness programs. But deep down, it wasn’t aligned with who I was becoming. The rules, policies, and politics made me shrink instead of shine.
Leaving that job felt terrifying. But in hindsight, it was the biggest sign of all—that I was meant for more.
The same thing happened with certain coaches, mentors, or even networking groups. I thought they held the “answers.” But when doors slammed shut, I realized those weren’t rejections—they were redirections.
And that’s the truth about signs:
They don’t just point toward what’s right.
They often highlight what’s wrong.
How to Recognize Real Signs (and Not Random Noise)
People often ask, “How do I know if something’s a sign or just coincidence?”
There’s no single formula, but there are patterns.
Here are three ways I recognize real signs:
Inner Resonance.
A true sign feels alive. You sense peace or excitement—even if it doesn’t make logical sense.
For example, I once took a social media detox (and yes, even a ChatGPT detox!) because my intuition told me those platforms were distracting me from my own inner wisdom. Once I stepped back, clarity rushed in. That inner peace? That’s resonance.
Repetition.
Sometimes a phrase, opportunity, or person keeps showing up. When the same theme repeats itself from different directions, pay attention. The universe loves patterns.
Alignment with Your Values.
A real sign won’t pull you toward fear or scarcity. It will point toward growth, kindness, and authenticity.
When I started saying no to fear-based people and situations, I noticed how quickly my business aligned with my purpose. Suddenly, higher-paying clients and opportunities that matched my heart began appearing.
The clearer I got about my values, the louder the signs became.
From Corporate Wellness to Chief Encouragement Officer
For years, I called myself a Corporate Wellness Consultant.
Now, I proudly call myself the Chief Encouragement Officer.
Why? Because that title feels like me.
It reflects my real purpose—encouraging people, building healthy teams, and connecting leaders with wellness professionals who uplift entire organizations.
That shift didn’t come from a marketing plan. It came from signs. Little whispers saying, “Go bigger, think bolder, lead with your heart.”
And every time I trusted one of those whispers, a new opportunity appeared.
Leadership Lessons from Ted Lasso
Every character in “Signs” teaches us something powerful about leadership and life:
Ted shows us that courage isn’t the absence of fear—it’s facing fear with faith. He puts down his drink, picks up the phone, and has the hard conversation.
Rebecca shows us that humility opens the door for magic. Once she stopped arguing with life and started noticing, her psychic’s predictions came true in the sweetest ways.
Keeley shows us how to pivot with grace. When one door closed, she didn’t crumble. She simply turned the handle on the next one.
Nate reminds us that ego-driven choices eventually reveal their cost. When he “sleeps with Rupert” (metaphorically and literally in the story), he starts seeing who the real villain is—and realizes he’s been following the wrong signs.
The thread between all these stories?
Detachment.
Each person learns to stop forcing outcomes and starts listening instead.
Detachment Isn’t Apathy
Let’s clear something up:
Detachment doesn’t mean giving up.
It means trusting that you can handle what comes, even when it’s not what you scripted.
I learned this the hard way during a painful custody battle years ago. Eventually, I just said, “You know what? Let go. He can have what he thinks he wants.”
And when I truly released control, something incredible happened—I began feeling connected to my kids in a deeper, spiritual way. I knew when they were sad, sick, or hurting.
That’s the beauty of letting go.
When you stop trying to control everything, you start feeling everything.
Practical Ways to Let Go
Set Intentions, Not Ultimatums.
Instead of saying, “I must land this client,” say, “I’m open to the right opportunities to serve.”
Openness invites alignment. Ultimatums invite anxiety.
Celebrate Small Confirmations.
Notice the tiny wins and write them down.
Your brain will want to forget them (thanks, negativity bias), but documenting them builds trust in life’s flow.
Soothe Your Nervous System.
Breathwork, walks, music, and quiet moments remind your body that safety doesn’t come from control—it comes from calm presence.
Speak Gratitude Aloud.
Thank every little sign that appears.
“Thank you for this nudge.”
“Thank you for that ‘no’—it protected me.”
Gratitude shifts your vibration from fear to faith.
Expect Miracles.
Replace “expectations” with “expect miracles.”
When you expect miracles, life starts rearranging itself in your favor.
What This Means for You
After you read this, take a breath.
Think about one area of your life where you’re gripping too tightly.
Maybe it’s your business.
Maybe it’s a relationship.
Maybe it’s your timeline for success.
Now loosen your grip.
Say aloud: “I trust that what’s meant for me will not miss me.”
Then watch what happens.
People will show up.
Ideas will drop in.
Doors will open.
And when they do—write them down.
Those are your signs.
They’re not random.
They’re reminders that life is always responding to your openness.
Final Thoughts
The Ted Lasso episode “Signs” reminds us of something simple yet profound:
Life is talking to us all the time.
But to hear it, we have to slow down, soften our expectations, and listen.
If you’re in a season of uncertainty, take heart.
You’re not lost—you’re being led.
The signs are already around you.
Stay curious.
Stay open.
And let the magic slip in.
About Kathie Owen
Kathie Owen is a Corporate Wellness Consultant and Chief Encouragement Officer based in Houston, Texas. With over 25 years of experience in fitness, wellness, and leadership, she helps high-performing executives and teams create healthy, happy workplaces—one heart at a time. Through her Energy Reset Method, keynote speaking, and her Skool community Corporate Wellness Pros, Kathie teaches leaders how to live and lead with clarity, courage, and calm.
Read More Articles from Kathie
Transcript
You are listening to Kathie's Coaching podcast. I'm your host, Kathie Owen. Welcome back to My Lessons from Ted Lasso series, where we use stories from the show to better understand our own lives and leadership journeys. Today we're exploring one of my favorite episodes. It's called Signs. This episode is full of little winks from the universe, signs that show up unexpectedly, and it lines up beautifully with what's happening in my own life right now. And I wanna unpack why signs matter, how we can recognize them, and how letting go of rigid expectations can make life flow in ways we couldn't have scripted. If you're new here, be sure to subscribe to our channel and hit that little bell. Say you never miss an episode from me, because I'll be sharing more updates and lessons I've learned from episodes like Ted Lasso. In the episode signs, Ted and the team are on a rollercoaster. Rebecca is seeing psychics and wondering about destiny, but she is very pessimistic about this psychic. In fact, her mother sent her to this psychic and the psychic was telling her things that she just did not believe, but it changes and we're gonna talk about that. And then there's Keeley who is searching for direction in her business. And Ted himself once again is navigating doubt and faith. And I also wanna mention here that Ted Lasso has anxiety. He has severe panic attacks, and I can relate to that. And I wanna talk more about this on my channel because, mental health is very important to address and keep in mind. So just remember that as you're listening to this today. So what's beautiful is how different each character's signs are. Rebecca literally hears the psychic's words echo back to her in her own life later. Keely stumbles into unexpected business opportunities, but also faces endings she didn't plan. And Ted's sign is not flashy. It is actually subtle shifts that tell him he's exactly where he is supposed to be. It's a reminder that signs look different for everyone. Let's be honest, humans love control. We want the plan, the guarantee, the map. But growth rarely comes with a printed itinerary. We crave signs because deep down we wanna know we are safe, that we're moving towards something meaningful. But here's the paradox. Signs come alive. When we release control, they show up. When we stop demanding how and when things happen. So I've been working myself on detaching from how my business grows, the moment I stop trying to micromanage every client outcome, every unexpected partnership and opportunities started appearing like crazy, like the invite to speak on a new gig, a new speaking gig, or a new collaborator. And I'm going to share some more signs that I've gotten as we go through this episode. So dropping expectations. You know, you hear me talk about this often and why it's so hard, and I talk about dropping expectations in my core speech, which that's pretty much what it's about. But I want share something with you that I want you to start expecting an opportunity to learn. So when we are talking about Ted Lasso as a whole, he is all about hope and humility In signs, we watch characters wrestle with uncertainty. The reason signs feel magical isn't that life suddenly changed. It's that they stopped clinging for a second. And the other day I came across this quote that said. When we are encountering events that are uncertain. What happens is we can either face it with courage or we can face it with fear, and I invite you to look at courage when it comes to a fearful situation and face it with courage. Because let me tell you something that really changed for me when I did that. So it's hard to let go because our nervous system craves safety. For me, this has looked like facing fearful emotions with that courage and wanting and expecting things the way I thought it should be. And I put should in quotes because it's actually a dirty word, and I thought things should be when that was just not the right way to go. And I see that when I connect the dots looking backwards. And then I also wanted my next move to feel guaranteed. I wanted to feel certain, and we can't be guaranteed certainty. And when we open up and let go and drop our expectations, different things happen. But the moment I practice what I call open-handed living, trusting, relaxing the grip, tiny doors swing open. I kept thinking in my past that my corporate job was the answer. No. That job was full of policy and procedures and propaganda, and actually was a small step to go in the direction that I needed to go. It was actually a small sign that I was on the right path, but that wasn't where I belonged. Or that business coach that held the answers or social media holds the answers. Even ChatGPT used to think that it held the answers, but when I released that, things started showing up differently. And I even had networking events that I thought held my next big connection, but I started seeing signs that I was thinking way. Too small. For example, my corporate job, I started seeing signs that that was not where I was meant to be. And even over the last years that since I had left that job, I started seeing signs where, wow, that was so, so small. And that was definitely not where I belonged. And actually, I've had business coaches. Or people who were trying to teach certain things online, and I thought that they held the answers and that was definitely not the case. And then also, let's talk about some networking events. I had met certain people and I started hearing certain signs that were clearly not in alignment with me. They were thinking in scary terms or in very limited beliefs that started to show up as big signs. It was kind of funny how that that happened and those doors kept slamming shut, and thank goodness they did. So how to recognize real signs versus random noise. So people always ask me, but how do you know it's a sign? And not just a coincidence, there's no single formula, but here are a few reflections. Inner resonance, a real sign often hits you with a sense of aliveness or peace, even if it doesn't make logical sense. So. I want to talk about this because I have recently done a social media detox and a chat GPT detox because I felt like those things were. Signs I was not headed in the right direction. And especially now that I've been off of it for long enough, I can see that, oh yeah, that was not the right answer. That was leading me down the wrong path. And it's not bad. I mean, I still use chat GPT for my business or for quick ideas and things like that, but I don't go to it for personal advice or for. Advice on my anxiety, and that has changed a lot of different things, and I'm amazed at that. So here's another reflection for I want you to look at, and that's called repetition. You might see the same theme word or opportunity show up repeatedly and unexpectedly. And yeah, I did start seeing same themes and words and opportunities show up, but when I sat in meditation and really contemplated it wasn't those repetitions that really worked. I wanna go back to inner resonance that is more impactful and also alignment with your values. Real signs usually point you toward growth, kindness. Or authentic desires, not fear or harm. So with me, I had to think bigger. I had to think much, much bigger than I was thinking. For example, with my corporate job. That was so, so minuscule. And then when I got out of it, I started looking to networking opportunities or to small businesses in my area when those people weren't even calling me back. And in fact, what I really needed to do was align with my values. And just start speaking my truth and just start being myself and being authentic, which is what this Ted Lasso episode is actually doing. And when I did that, I started seeing bigger things come onto my plate, like people asking me to speak at their speaking events and get paid big money for it. And also, I also started aligning with clients out of the blue like. Randomly at the most random places and. This did not happen, like just because I wanted it to happen or expected it to happen, it happened because I was in alignment with my values. And so by being in alignment with what I value instead of let's say what the corporate job had valued, that was not in alignment with my values. Or let's say I met somebody at a networking event that was talking about fear mongering and fear-based thinking. I started to see that as a sign that that's not the right path, because once I did that, the bridge of incidents that Neville Goddard talks about started opening up and I started to see, oh, okay, this is where I need to be. And I was thinking a lot bigger. And the companies that are working with me now are paying me a lot more money than these other companies. That would've taken me 10 companies to get what this one company was paying me. And that was because I was in alignment with my values and I started to seek roles as a chief encouragement officer. Instead of just a corporate wellness for teams. Now as a Chief Encouragement Officer, what I do is I inline other people that I know that are in corporate wellness that actually can come and benefit my team as a business, and then we go work with other companies. But I am the Chief Encouragement Officer and that title just feels a whole lot more like me. So the leadership lesson in this episode for leaders, entrepreneurs, parents, anyone guiding others signs, shows us that leading isn't always about pushing harder. Sometimes it's about listening to your own intuition to what life is, quietly offering to the feedback loops around you. Ted doesn't bulldoze. He notices, and I love how he talked to his soon to be ex-wife on a phone call and how he actually confronted his fear with her and told her what was going on. He actually had a cocktail in his hand and he put it down before he got on there, which means he was totally giving in to the fear with courage. With his own courage, he confronted that fear and he actually told her how he felt about the situation. And then Rebecca, she was so dismissive of the psychic when the psychic told her, she actually left the psychic's office in anger and frustration, and she told her she was wrong. And how rude. But when she starts to see the signs that the psychic had called out, she was forced to stay open and then Keely. Had some doors close on her and she was in a place where she didn't know what to do and how to move, and then she just pivoted. And each real power is in being present and willing to pivot when life whispers. So take Rebecca, she didn't know really what those signs were, but when she started seeing them, she was willing to listen to those whispers. Take Ted. He actually confronted his fears. With courage and so did Keely when she had the same pivot when the doors closed. And I also wanna bring up Nate. Um, he went to coach for the other team for uh, Rupert. And I'm actually gonna do episodes that are called Sleeping with Rupert.'cause Rupert is the villain in all of the stories. He's such a bad guy and he's so egotistical and so pretentious, and. A sign that Nate saw was he started to see the real Rupert instead of what was really happening behind closed doors. So Rupert led Nate down the wrong path and he starts to see that. And I'm gonna talk more about, I'll call it Sleeping with Rupert, and I'll be talking about that more. So I wanna talk about detachment and what it means and, and practicing detachment without numbing out. Because when I look back on my path and my letting go, there was one time when I was going through a serious custody battle for many, many years with my ex-husband, and at one point in time I just finally said, you know what? I let go. Let him have everything he thinks he wants. Here you go. You can have it all. I mean, I went all out, let go. And when I did that, I became in touch with my kids. Spiritually, I knew what was going on all the time spiritually, and it wasn't like I was spying on them or anything like that. I, what I mean by that is I got in touch with them in a way where I even knew when one of'em was sick or had a headache or felt bad or was hurting in some really bad way. I just knew. And I trusted that. And so when you detach, it doesn't mean apathy. It means trusting that you can handle what comes, even if it's not what you scripted. So for example, my ex-husband would take my kids out of the country and take'em on cruises, and I actually found out that I wasn't even the emergency contact person for these vacations that they were taking. And at this point, there was no getting. My ex, uh, let's just call him Rupert.'cause he's very much aligned with the character Rupert, which is not a judgmental thing. I'm just saying that's what it was. That, that he was the villain in this story because yeah, that's a villain. If they're not gonna tell who the mother is of the children. Um, when you're going out of the country, I, that's just. A villain. Sorry, saying say it. Call it what it is, but let's just go to this. If he's not even going to do that. And that's what I had scripted. I mean, you expect somebody to go, yeah, this is the mother of my children. But I realized I could handle what comes. I knew they'd be safe. I knew they'd be okay, even though I wouldn't be able to talk to them on Christmas or on whatever day it was because he always took'em out whenever it was a big day. And I just let it go because really and truly it didn't matter and. That may be what I scripted, but I figured out that when I let go and I detached, I could handle what comes. So here are some practical ways to practice this. Set intentions, not UL alternatives instead of, I must get so and so client say, I'm open to the right opportunities to serve. And I did this because when I started not setting ultimatums and thinking that these networking events were gonna get my clients, yeah, I could have gotten clients, but guess what? They were not my ideal client. They didn't want a chief encouragement officer. They just wanted somebody to come in and do wellness days or do a little something and. Perhaps that wasn't what I needed, so I stay open to the right opportunities to serve. And then another practical way to practice detachment is celebrate small confirmation. Notice when something unexpected but good happens and write it down. Now, my self mastery coach, she tells me to do this and I'm so glad she did that because I can look, it's so easy to, for. Forget. It's so easy to forget the good things that happen, believe it or not. That's just because our brains are wired with that dang negativity bias, that it will help us forget it. And I invite you to start. Celebrating small confirmations. For example, I documented a small win when I was at a networking event and I had this guy tell me he didn't wanna be in Toastmasters anymore because he already got all the way through to distinguish Toastmaster and he didn't need it anymore. I was floored. And then he, all of a sudden he walked away from me and I'm like. Okay. That was very poor communication on his part, and he also kind of seemed mean. Now maybe he was in a bad mood that day or something like that. I, I totally give him the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time, I'm like, oh. Because when I opened up to that, I had an actual distinguished Toastmaster who runs a speaking business, come up to me just a few days later and tell me, um, I need you to come speak at a speaking event. And I'm like, oh, absolutely. Hands down. And I'm so excited. And that was a celebration of a small confirmation. What that showed me was. Somebody saying that this means this is not always the truth. And then you get a small confirmation going, yep, you were right Kathie. I love when that happened. And then another practical way to practice this is soothe your nervous system. As somebody who has been clinically diagnosed with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, I can tell you without a doubt that I have had serious trauma. And serious anxiety, but I don't attach to that anxiety. And when I did that, I started practicing breath work. I started practicing walks with nature and listening to music. So that detachment doesn't feel like danger because sometimes your nervous system will go, oh my God, why aren't you doing this? Or, why aren't you doing that? And ever since I left my corporate job, a lot of times I'd sit down at my computer and all of a sudden I'd feel anxiety. And I was like, why am I having anxiety? What's wrong? There's nothing coming up. And when I started contemplating that, what happened was I started realizing. Oh, that's where that anxiety came from because I was having all of this doubt from my leader. She was so mean and so hateful to me. And I'm like, you know, that's not in my life right now. That lion is gone. We already accomplished that and it's all dead and gone. And you know that because what what happened was they expected me to be just a fitness person. That's what was expected of me. But the employees couldn't work out 40 hours a week. But I was expected to be on campus 40 hours a week. Now, if you know me, you know, my job does not entail 40 hours a week. It, my job is so simple. So what I did was I started creating value. I started writing blog posts. I started creating content. They actually gave me two monitors out there and a microphone so I could record episodes. They, they gave me this, yet I wasn't supposed to do it. It was so contradictory that it just blows my mind. But here's the thing, and I say this with all my heart, that was just the universe saying that is not where you belong. Just like the guy telling me Toastmasters was out and not needed, that was the universe giving me a sign that that's not where I need to be. I need to be in bigger rooms. I need to be bigger and think bigger, and dream bigger, and I invite you to do the same and at the same time, I promise you, you're gonna have to soothe your nervous system because your nervous system is gonna think things are not safe. Remember how we do that. We do that with courage. And courage can be as simple as stepping away and going to meditate and doing breath work, or going for a walk in nature or listening to music and picturing your ideal vision. Hey, that sounds like fun. Alright, and another practical way to practice this is speak gratitude aloud. Gratitude is such a high vibrational feeling. When you start experiencing gratitude and living in gratitude, things just multiply and it happens rapidly. So you thank that sign when it shows up. Oh wow. Thank you very much. Because it conditions your brain to feel safe with uncertainty. So again, when you feel safe with uncertainty, what do you do? You have courage and courage. Takes you up to gratitude and when you feel gratitude, you vibrate a lot higher. So some of my personal tools was gratitude, rampages, and I've talked about that before on my channel, how I even started thinking up random words to get my mind off of whatever I was anxious about. And then affirmations, like, I expect miracles. So remember how I said expectations are a funny thing and how expectations can actually disappoint you and limit you well instead of just plain expectations. I invite you to expect miracles when you expect miracles. That's when things happen, that's when these signs come in. And they may feel like awful signs in the first place, but really what they're doing is they're guiding you to where you're supposed to be. And then on my morning walks with Rusty, where I would just sit there and have a conversation with myself, I'd actually go on a rampage about how great my life was, how great things were coming, and. Even just sitting out in nature because clarity comes that way, and that is one thing I wanna leave you with is the social media detox. The chat GPT detox is where my clarity came from. Instead of looking at those things, I found my clarity from inside. So here's what you can try. After watching this today or listening to this today, I want you to reflect on one area of life where you're gripping too tightly and name it and then play with loosening your timeline or your must happen this way rules. Just play with loosening that and should happen this way rules. And then notice what small nudges appear. People reaching out ideas, popping in opportunities you didn't chase. I'm serious. They happen. And then journal them because you wanna remember these wins and over time you'll build trust that signs aren't random, they are life responding to your openness. Yeah. So the beauty of the episode signs is it reminds us that life is actually talking to us all the time. But we have to be quiet enough and brave enough to listen without demanding how it should look. If you're in a season of not knowing, I hope this gives you hope. Keep showing up, stay curious and let go just enough for the magic to slip in. I'll keep sharing more Ted Lasso life lessons here. So if this resonated with you, please subscribe and join me on this journey. And if you've noticed your own signs lately, I'd love to hear in the comments your story could encourage someone else. All right, that's my episode for today. I trust that you found it helpful, and if you know someone who can benefit from this, please share it with them. And until next time, I'll see you next time. Peace out and namaste. I.
Discover how to recognize life's subtle signs and embrace the power of letting go, inspired by Ted Lasso's wisdom. This guide reveals practical ways to release control, cultivate trust, and welcome unexpected opportunities through detachment and mindfulness.
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